Battle of the week: Callum From The Forum vs Jay Cruz
It seems a lifetime ago that Callum (from the forum) announced that he would finally step in the ring if he reached 1,000 Twitter followers. Unsurprisingly, C-Magic reached that figure almost instantly and the gears were set in motion for this clash of legendary proportions.
Perhaps most enjoyable about this battle is that it is the clearest reflection yet of Don’t Flop’s online community and the mega-hyped manner in which the league’s fanbase has responded to the participation of a behind-the-scenes guy like Callum. Oh no wait, what am I saying? The most enjoyable thing about this battle is that Callum did a flip (setting the record straight on whether or not he has a sister).
From a technique point of view, there was nothing wrong with Callum’s delivery. The circumstances of the battle meant that the crowd would be very receptive to Callum’s material, and the material was damn funny (‘look at me when I’m blocking you’ was a particular highlight).
Jay Cruz acquitted himself well. His Zinedine Zidane bar was worthy of the main channel, and his attempts at earnestly delivering threats was undermined by the hilarity of the whole battle. As J-Short mentioned in his judging segment, some of Cruz’ bars were hard to understand (what did he say about an aquarium tattoo?) but he gave a performance that’ll guarantee him a spot on future cards.
Impact vs Sno
This battle was the co-main event of Don’t Flop Detroit. One competitor brought it, one did not. It only took one minute and 45 seconds for Sno to hit us with the classic ‘I’m choking’ phrase ‘but fuck it’ and from then on Impact had it wrapped up. Unfortunately for Impact, Sno’s wackness killed the room’s atmosphere so he wasn’t getting the love his bars deserved. He’ll hope for a more competitive clash with Flex Digits at Sunburn 2 in two weeks.
Danny Jaqq vs J Dillon
J Dillon’s formula has not let him down once. A relentless barrage of jokes, nearly all of them hitters, make for a hilarious performance every time. His standout here was ‘everything you eat is George Foreman, everything you wear is George… for men.’ Danny Jaqq did some nice exposing in his third that’ll probably give every single future J Dillon opponent a place to start. Jaqq also called out Shox and Tali for a two-on-two with himself and Heretic that would be well worth putting together.
Soljitsu vs Cojay & Ambi
Soljitsu has been stepping up his game in a big way lately. His first round here was as funny as ever with added performance value and changes in cadence that will make him more of a threat. Ambi and Cojay put in solid work here too, Ambi has a unique wit that could take him far and Cojay is bringing cleverer writing than ever (‘I guess playing troll takes its toll when you wanna be comedic because how can you cross that bridge when you’re living underneath it?)
Freestyle Royal Rumble 3
Another star-studded Freestyle Royal Rumble, this time featuring vets such as Nils m/Skils, TheSaurus, Dirtbag Dan, Pedro and Double L. Nils bodies it with his typically top notch off-the-top game, Dan bodies it with his psilocybin induced rambling, and Double L bodies the whole room with one line. Must watch.
Nutty P WebHam
When you consider some WebHam videos only last for ninety seconds and fail to impress, you have to pay respect when someone like Nutty P kills it for a full five minutes. Nutty P is smooth and relentless at the same time, have a listen here.